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Friday, January 25, 2013

How to age gracefully without falling on your face...


As IF...  she says in her best Alicia Silverstone voice from the movie Clueless.  I don't want to age!

I may not know much about being graceful or not falling on my face, but I do know a little bit about getting older...aging.  And yes, it sucks.  Beats the heck out of alternative, though.

It's already been established - I'm no spring chicken anymore.  Ugh!  Even typing out in this blog that I'm almost 50 makes me want to vomit.  Really.

Just the other day I was 20 something and out partying in the clubs until 3 am, catching a few z's, getting up for work at 6 and doing it all over again.  Now - I fall asleep on the couch by 10 pm - if I make it that far.  Seriously, WTF?

I can remember being an early 30 something & my 40 something boss blurted out that after 40 there's just not much elasticity in your skin anymore.  I was thinking - holy crap.  That sucks for her.  She'd better do something about that!

So, now here I am....40 something.  My teeter totter officially tipped toward the next zero a few years ago, and I'm rolling down hill fast to that big 5-0.  No, I'm not graceful about it.  I've chosen to ignore it!

I've still got a few more years before I actually get to 50 - but when they say time marches on, they really got it right.  What they neglected to say is that it marches right straight across your face.

This freaks me out.  I've adjusted to the fact that I'll never again in my life be a size zero.  That's cool.  I was much too skinny then anyway and I like a good ice cream Sunday as much as the next chubby chick.  Cheers, sweetie.  What I have issues with is LOOKING older.  A case of supreme vanity...

I've done OK so far.  If I do say so myself.  I've been complimented many times by people telling me they thought I was only 37.  Woot!  I'll take that!  I can't remember if there was alcohol involved - but who cares!  10 years younger is 10 years younger.  Talk young to me, baby.

For the most part, genetics have been kind to me.
Oh, no no no -- for my skin, only for my skin.  Fortunately I've been able to escape much of the other stuff floating in the family gene pool. Genetically, my family has great, youthful looking skin.  I don't take that for granted.

I'm going share some other stuff with you on keeping that youthful appearance.

Guys, you don't need to leave - you don't want to end up looking like Robert Redford either.  While he was quite the hottie in his day, he hit the wall hard much younger than he should have.  Robert not selling it for you?  Let's check Kris Kristofferson and Clint Eastwood.  We cool now?  Wanna keep reading?  Good!

Yeah, holy heck.  Right?
I will NEVER resort to the knife or allow people stick needles in my face.  The thought alone just freaks me out.  Yeah, I've heard the ol "Botox isn't bad." thing.  No thanks.  Have you ever seen the old lady in Real Housewives of Miami....  yeah - not for me thanks.

Let's just work with what we've got, shall we?

So here we go...
Cream up.  That's right - slather moisturizer all over your face.  Often.
Guys you don't wear make up - so you're good to throw that stuff on your face any time of the day.  The elements are brutal.  Not just sun exposure - but the cold winter air - brutal.  Get the good stuff like Eucerin or something.  Spend the money.  Put it on as often as possible.  Hands, face - whatever you want to keep young looking.  Keep in mind, it's not a magic potion and it will only do so much.

Women, take your make up off before you go to bed.  EVERY NIGHT - ALL OF IT!  Also, try to not wear sooo much of it that you look like a completely different person.  My daddy always told me that no man wants to wake up to a woman who's face is in the night table drawer.

Wash your face with baby wash.  Really!  I use baby oil for my eye make up & baby shampoo or baby wash for my face.  (be sure alcohol isn't in the ingredients.)  Heads up... baby oil in your eyes stings.  Ha, I just got a mental vision of you guys ala Mel Gibson in What Women Want.

After washing I put lotion all over my face, neck & chest.  I started seeing these little rings around my neck & upper chest...  Freaked me right out.

This won't make the wrinkly lines go away, but it will keep them at bay.

Drink water - LOTS OF IT.  Stay hydrated!  I'd love to be the first one to tell you that coffee counts, but sadly it doesn't and it dehydrates you.  Yes, you will be peeing like a race horse all day long - but your skin will glow.  It's also good for your digestive health, etc.

Stay out of the damn sun!  I am a former sun worshiper.  I was spared facial damage from the sun, but only because I've always taken care of my skin.  If you're going to go out put heavy duty sun screen on your face ESPECIALLY AROUND YOUR EYES.  Your eyes take a beating & are the first to wrinkle.

Speaking of eye wrinkles... Sunglasses.  Always.  Not just for the summer, but always.  I have a few pair everywhere.  Squinting makes wrinkles.  Even when it's not very bright out, you're squinting.

Let's move on to hair...  Some things we can help, some things we can't.
Genetics sometimes suck for guys.  No biggie....Really!  Just do us all a favor, yourself included.  Do NOT resort to the comb over or plugs or weaves.  If it gets so thin that you can't deal.  Shave it all off and grow a goatee!  Trust me!  It gives you a whole new edge & chicks dig it.  Have you seen pics of my hubs??  Au natural baby...  :)

Women - conditioner.  Condition, condition, condition.  Especially in the summer time.  Keep a little travel bottle in your beach bag with the suntan lotion.  Put it on your hair before you go in the sun & after you get out of the water.  Also, slather it into your dry hair before bed.

Teeth.... Another thing my daddy used to say... Be true to your teeth and they'll never be false to you.  Brush  & floss those bad boys - regularly.  Yes, FLOSS!  Don't skip dental appointments.  White teeth are fabulous.  All of them are even better.  Get it?

Oh, and no one likes chronic halitosis.  Invest in Altoids if you have an issue.

I'd like to tell you to lay off the sauce because it's just no damn good for you, but I just love my wine and I'm no hypocrite.  It's heart healthy!

Besides, alcohol has been helping...  Well - you know the rest.

I hope my ever flowing plethora of knowledge fountain has enlightened you in many ways.  Now go forth and be young fogies!

Cheers!

Thank you for reading my blog!

~Jenn


1 comment:

  1. Reading this is everything I say to myself. Unlike you, I was not lucky enough to inherit good skin. Both my parents wrinkled fast and hard. I already see it in me. I'm 38 and freaking the hell out about 40 closing in. Thanks for the tips, I will do them, all of them all at once!

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